Bedside alarm goes off. It’s 6 in the morning. Hit snooze. Cell phone alarm goes off. It’s 6:05 AM. Opening and closing silences it. Bedside alarm goes off again. It’s 6:09 A.M. Process repeats until I can’t stand it anymore. I get up. I greet my dog. I hop in the shower. I hop out of the shower. I briefly wonder why I’m always hopping. I put on my bathroom goods. I weigh myself. I do a little dance. I dress. I take the dog for a walk. I drive to work. There are usually two variations to this pattern of events. The boring variation is that my car is sometimes blocked in the parking garage. I get The Garge Dudes to unblock me. Occasionally I’ll move the blocker myself as the keys are left in the offending car. BMW’s are pretty. The cool variation happens when I walk my dog. I usually take a walk around my building to let him do his business. As people walk past me, I’ve noticed nearly all of them are programmed to respond to the query, ”Hey, how you doin?” I never ask them that. I say ”Good morning,” smile and make direct eye contact. Most people are looking down at first and avoiding me, but when they hear ”Good morning!” they’re pleasantly surprised. Well, sometimes they wonder what the hell just happened and walk away in confision. Those that aren’t frightened struggle to respond quickly. Here’s the funny part of this story: They usually expect ”How you doin?” so they say, ”I’m just fine.” I can’t count the number of times I’ve said, ”Good morning” only to have someone reply, ”I’m just fine” or ”Doin’ Good!” They walk away thinking whatever they’re thinking and I never see them again. Ah… Philly.