When students start referring to the movies AIRPLANE and AIRPLANE 2 as classics, I know I’m getting older.


Amy K, a girl who I had delivered a Seventeen magazine to for months and months and months when I was a slave for the Houston Chronicle, is in the class I am substituting for at this moment. Thanks to being able to hear every conversation that takes place in here, I’ve learned that she doesn’t want serious relationships. She’ll break up with guys who want to stay with her for long periods of time. Wow. Those stupid jerks! What are they thinking? A long tem relationship? What, are they crazy? She denied having a subscription when I mentioned it in casual conversation. If only there was a way to root out girls like this from the future dating pool. I don’t mean root them out like get rid of them, I mean to FIND them in the first place.


It’s now 6th period. A student has one of those fake head-wound things on his temple. This is how advanced technology has changed the way we pull pranks. Rather than a fake finger in a box, a real-looking rip in the flesh of someone’s head has taken its place. Amusing and gross. Cool. I’d have been sent home for sure.


I’ve got one of those yearly planner books that I will use for many months in a row and then lose track of. There are huge gaps in there and I prefer not to guess about what happened during those days. I’d like to get really creative and make false entries into the planner. I could make it look like I was some psycho serial killer, the Unabomber, or (more legally) some secret agent. Now that would be cool. Deep Space Nine, of all shows, tackled the secret agent genre just this week. Damn good episode = my highest compliment. I am a geek, after all.


I’m going to have to write my DS9 episode before the year ends. I am now declaring this as a goal. I’ve had the show’s writer guidelines for a year and have done zero work. Things will change.