30-Jul-2001 Uncategorized

second time’s the charm

I saw ”Planet of the Apes” again on Friday. My view has completely changed and I’m giving this work of art a positive thumbs up. My review will be
forthcoming. I also bought the soundtrack. It rocks. Very Batman-esque. Where can I buy a Danny Elfman bust?



Pat Croce 
Imposter

Mark Shields
 day 26 [Ft. Washington, PA] imposter

To the right you’ll see two very similar guys. The one on the left is Pat Croce, president of
the Philadelphia Sixers basketball team. Very flamboyant and intriguing when he speaks. The
guy on the right IS A CLONE FROM OUTER SPACE. Okay. Not really. Although I did
made an ass out of myself by walking up to the fake Croce guy at
the ”Planet” premiere and congratulating him on the past season. ”I have no idea what
you’re talking about,” he said. I was like, ”What? You know, Mutombo. Iverson. Your dudes! The team!
Hey, are you gonna go over there and kick Shaq’s ass right now?” I motioned toward where
Shaquille O’Neal was standing. ”Leave me alone!” He stomped off with his Lucy Liu lookalike girlfriend.
I couldn’t
believe it! He was a clone for crying out loud. I decided not to make any more guesses
about who someone was. Just blatantly obvious celebrities would get my ”congratulations!” treatment.
Bill Paxton was there, but I didn’t recognize him. He’s gotten Puffy. And I’m not talking about
Puffy Combs. Speaking of, Puffy Combs looked exactly like he does on TV. Helena Bonham Carter, however, was
completely unrecognizable for me. She was gorgeous, of course, but I’ve seen ”Fight Club” so
many times that I was expecting a frizzy haired chick with bruises and hickeys on her neck to show
up.


Reviews are coming in for Planet and they are generally panning the film while still admiring its
beauty and texture. Unfortunately, the critics wanted a stronger story and better dialog.
I am sure the movie will do boffo box office this weekend and most likely drop off 50% (as usual
for this summer) next week. The next film out from Wahlberg, ”Metal God”, will erase
any doubts about his performance in Apes which was the best he could do given the material. I really
liked the film, but I think there were a number of things that could have been done differently.
I definitely need to get into that line of work and expand my creative abilities.
People I know in Houston have very recently left me somewhat
disillusioned by their lack of depth and the size of their ego. When you have things falling into your
lap with minimal effort it is quite obvious that a blind monkey in a pink nightgown could have done
the same damn thing. It’s kind of like the guy at the box office of a movie theater taking credit
for how well the movie did. Duh! But I digress.