Do you have a lot of free time? I’m posting up the mp3 files that I made a few months ago for your listening displeasure. Most of it is pretty boring, but I figured I’d put them online for the sake of making them available to the entire earth. Check out what you’ve been missing!

• Warner Cable was formerly known as QUBE cable. They had some talk show on TV 3 (i.e. channel 3 — how clever) that you could participate in with a little hand controller they had. We ended up just pranking them, instead. The first caller throws out an expletive but they don’t seem to get it.
• For some reason I sneaked a tape recorder into the theater with me when I saw STAR TREK 2: THE WRATH OF KHAN on opening day.
• This is just my reading a book based on Helen Keller’s early life and my sister helping out. We were in 4th and 6th grade at the time.
• I forget what this is. It’s an entire side of a tape.
• My Aunt Jean calls and quizes us about where we live.
• This is some guy that was trying to call my old BBS but I had the answering machine hooked up.
• One of a series of calls. Trey D’Amico is a friend I’d met online in 1983.
• Trey is talking it up and occasionally yelling in this one.
• More of Trey and now I’m on the phone and we’re doing some kind of phone phreaking. It’s not what you think.
• First of a series of audio clips I made as I interview a bunch of kittens that my family’s cats had.
• Another kitten report. I don’t think I started squeezing kittens just yet, but maybe so.
• Yet another kitten report. I love that I gave the data on these things.
• Several months down the road and another kitten report for the books.
• The last kitten report done a few years after the previous ones. I still live in the house where these happened.
• I liked Wonder Woman and for some reason I also liked to pretend I was the IRA computer from that show’s dismal seasons two and three.
• More of me faking a computer voice. Terrible!
• I’m pretty mean to my friend John Hall when we both sing this dumb little song, but he gets his revenge.
• Mark typing while whistling. Sorta.
• There used to be a free time service you could call in 1977. I was always fascinated with it.
• This is me reading my diary at some point. I recount my dad’s punishment where he burned my Astroworld season pass. Don’t worry — he got me a replacement. I have no idea what I’d done wrong, but I’m sure it related to being REALLY annoying.
• Jersey Village High School won a radio station contest in 1987 that awarded us with a visit from the band Ready for the World.
• More reaction from other students who called into the radio station after we won the radio station contest.
• This one is really, really long. It’s all of the messages that I had stored in my voicemail in 1988. There’s at least 50 or 60 individual messages, some from friends, girlfriends at the time, and my other phreaker phriends.

Good times? There is a bit of immaturity in these messages and some random cursing here and there. Please pardon me and/or forgive me. I’ve grown up considerably in the last 20 years just in case you feel like anything I said was offensive.