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Mark Shields
Super Genius
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boom boom boom

2002.06.12 21.23

Can't believe I've found this Star Trek toy on eBay. Had one when I was a wee lad and destructive tendencies didn't bode well with its ability to survive my childhood. I'm watching this auction as if the fate of the free world depends on it. I'd originally been eyeing a Remco Space 1999 Stun Gun. I found it very amusing when I last held one in the Foley's toy aisle back in 1977. The stun gun will look pretty fly clipped to my J. Crew tan belt. My fashion consultant will probably disagree.

And speaking of the DeLorean, I'vee been struggling to pass state inspection for the last few months. Took the car into the shop in April for some expensive fuel pump love. $1000 worth of love later, the car runs fine. Emissions standards for Harris County are so tough they make Van Diesel look like a drooling nerdy boy scout in comparison. Word up to all the boy scouts out there. So far I've failed the test, spent $100 to improve my emissions AND failed a second time. Luckily as I've driven less than 5,000 miles since my last inspection I now qualify for The Waiver. Gotta go to this little DPS office about 2 miles from my house to claim The Waiver. Have to make a Real Life Appointment before they'll even talk to me about The Waiver. Appointment is July 1st @ 8:30 A.M. At first, The Waiver People told me that July 1st was booked up. I cried: ''Wah, wah, I live in Philly that's the only day I can get my Back To The Future car to your office, wah wah!'' Next time I'm in Houston is August 26th. The Waiver People asked me to stop crying, but they didn't want to schedule an appointment that far in advance. Debbie, The Waiver Woman, heard me say ''Back to the Future'' during my belly aching and was suddenly hard up to see the car. ''Oh, I think I can fit you in on July 1st after all!'' Riight. Fit me in, where? Ahem. So, anyway, this weekend I plan to clean up and re-caulk all the time machine stuff back on. I'll take updated digital photos this time, I promise. ;-)

Chew Chew is now over whatever ailed him. He could barely walk from being all feverish and achey last time I saw him so this news r0x0rs. Dad and bro-in-law Frank are to thank for pooch recovery. Dad took Chew to the vet yesterday for first round of Adulticide heartworm ass kicking. Crossing fingers that all goes well. As soon as this is over he's coming to Philly to maybe take daily honorary pees in this great city. Ben Franklin would be proud. Actually, Ben Franklin would be mostly rotted away and scary. People would run away yelling, ''BEN FRANKLIN IS BACK FROM THE DEAD! SAVE YOURSELVES! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!''

Saw ''Making the Video'' last night. Topic? Kelly Osbourne's ''Poppa Don't Preach'' video. Sounds good, although I find it hilarious they're using the same Ozzy feedback effect on her voice. Wonder if I can get something made to make me sound like that 24/7.

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