stresssssssssss

2004.04.02 6.23

The Madonna tickets showed up earlier than expected. FedEx believed someone named Paul Shields has a signature waiver on record which meant they felt slipping the package under the gate and leaving it there was O.K. The people I bought the tickets from put my name on the airbill as Mike Sheilds (their spelling). After a few frantic hours talking to FedEx and GreatTickets.com, my dad was finally able to open my gate and retrieve the package. FedEx, in the meantime, was on a tear with their mindless logic.

FedEx: ''Only Paul Shields can remove the signature release, sir.''

Me: ''But there is no Paul Shields. There never was!''

FedEx: ''Well, Paul will have to go online and remove the release.''

Me: ''Hello? Peanut butter? Are you listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth? There is no such person.''

FedEx: ''Have him go to WWW dot FEDEX dot com.''

Me: ''I'm afraid Paul died last week. I killed him. His head is in my freezer next to the UPS delivery guy's head.''

FedEx: ''Sir, you have to go to WWW dot FEDEX dot com.""

Me: ''Where exactly? To the signature release removal section?''

FedEx: ''Exactly, sir.''

Me: ''Where is that on your site? I can't find it.''

FedEx: ''Please hold sir.''

[20 minutes pass]

FedEx: ''Sir I'm transferring you to Technical Support.''

Me: ''Those people handle problems with your FedEx business software, don't they? I don't want to talk to them.''

FedEx: ''Please hold the line, sir, while I transfer your call.''

After a few more minutes of talking to Technical Support, they did a 3-Way and connected me back to Customer Service where I got to speak with the I Will Not Let You Interrupt Me While I'm Talking Guy™. I was instructed to fax a note to the FedEx station near my house and ask them to remove the waiver. I seriously doubt they'll do it. Ugh. This was My Daily Drama.

My Daily Drama 2: Electric Boogaloo began just as soon as part 1 ended. I've been getting phone calls from Saab Financial Services. They would never tell me why they were calling, they'd just leave a huge 1-800 number and 5 digit extension in a voicemail message that I'd never answer. I called them and asked what the deal was. Apparently Texas charged them some kind of property tax fee for the car. This doesn't make any sense since the car was registered and inspected in Pennsylvania. The only time it left the state was to venture into New Jersey for beer, movies and Chew-Chew Petsmart visits. The charges total around $450 which there is no way in hail I'm gonna pay. If it ends up that I do have to pay it, they're going to be getting micropayments of $5 a month for the next few years.

Bio Journal Movies Photography Portals Wishlist
Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed here are my own only and in no way represent the views, positions or opinions - expressed or implied - of my employers both past and present. « venti half-caf non-fat with-whip caramel machiatto \| Main \| slur » stresssssssssss 2004.04.02 6.23 <MAP NAME="boxmap-p8"><AREA SHAPE="RECT" COORDS="14, 200, 103, 207" HREF="http://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm/privacy-policy.html?o=1" ><AREA COORDS="0,0,10000,10000" HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/redirect-home/markwahlbergcom" ></MAP><img src="http://rcm-images.amazon.com/images/G/01/rcm/120x240.gif" width="120" height="240" border="0" usemap="#boxmap-p8" alt="Shop at Amazon.com"> The Madonna tickets showed up earlier than expected. FedEx believed someone named Paul Shields has a signature waiver on record which meant they felt slipping the package under the gate and leaving it there was O.K. The people I bought the tickets from put my name on the airbill as Mike Sheilds (their spelling). After a few frantic hours talking to FedEx and GreatTickets.com, my dad was finally able to open my gate and retrieve the package. FedEx, in the meantime, was on a tear with their mindless logic. FedEx: ''Only Paul Shields can remove the signature release, sir.'' Me: ''But there is no Paul Shields. There never was!'' FedEx: ''Well, Paul will have to go online and remove the release.'' Me: ''Hello? Peanut butter? Are you listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth? There is no such person.'' FedEx: ''Have him go to WWW dot FEDEX dot com.'' Me: ''I'm afraid Paul died last week. I killed him. His head is in my freezer next to the UPS delivery guy's head.'' FedEx: ''Sir, you have to go to WWW dot FEDEX dot com."" Me: ''Where exactly? To the signature release removal section?'' FedEx: ''Exactly, sir.'' Me: ''Where is that on your site? I can't find it.'' FedEx: ''Please hold sir.'' [20 minutes pass] FedEx: ''Sir I'm transferring you to Technical Support.'' Me: ''Those people handle problems with your FedEx business software, don't they? I don't want to talk to them.'' FedEx: ''Please hold the line, sir, while I transfer your call.'' After a few more minutes of talking to Technical Support, they did a 3-Way and connected me back to Customer Service where I got to speak with the I Will Not Let You Interrupt Me While I'm Talking Guy™. I was instructed to fax a note to the FedEx station near my house and ask them to remove the waiver. I seriously doubt they'll do it. Ugh. This was My Daily Drama. My Daily Drama 2: Electric Boogaloo began just as soon as part 1 ended. I've been getting phone calls from Saab Financial Services. They would never tell me why they were calling, they'd just leave a huge 1-800 number and 5 digit extension in a voicemail message that I'd never answer. I called them and asked what the deal was. Apparently Texas charged them some kind of property tax fee for the car. This doesn't make any sense since the car was registered and inspected in Pennsylvania. The only time it left the state was to venture into New Jersey for beer, movies and Chew-Chew Petsmart visits. The charges total around $450 which there is no way in hail I'm gonna pay. If it ends up that I do have to pay it, they're going to be getting micropayments of $5 a month for the next few years. « venti half-caf non-fat with-whip caramel machiatto \| Main \| slur »