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Mark Shields
Super Genius
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In 1996 I tried several times to get hired by the local NBC affiliate, but failed every time. My real job at the time was programming and doing administrative work for the Houston Chronicle. My bosses were an interesting couple who closely resembled Dennis Hopper and Mrs. Roper (of Three's Company fame). I also had a paper route which I threw on Tuesday and Saturday nights which put my old Toyota Corolla through a beating. The magazine route I threw on Sundays saw me jogging 25 miles lugging magazine deliveries all over the city of Jersey Village. I still have a couple of cool, elastic knee braces from that time. Needless to say, I'm glad I've moved on to better things.

Although I did research all of the jobs I tried out for, I never received a response from Channel 2. I guess it was out of the boredom of waiting or maybe wishful thinking that I created the photo above. After sending them nearly ten resumes over the course of several months, I started sending the resumes with this picture printed at the top. I suspect they got a good laugh out of it, but I was certain after that point it was futile to think they'd have ever hired me. The photos were done in an ancient version of PaintShop Pro before I knew anything about anti-aliasing or Adobe -- so please excuse their crudity. Below you can see a bit of history in the making as I selected an image to merge. I eventually got really weird (surprised?) and made some aberrant modifications which include Caveman News Team and the Undead News Team.

Slowly Copy and Pasting Myself In

Evil Mark and the Evil Channel 2 News Team

Cave Man Mark and the Channel 2 News Cave People Team
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