the apple core
2003.03.31 6.49
Went to see ''The Core'' on Sunday while Chew Chew got The Treatment at the Cherry Hill, NJ Petsmart. This time he got his teeth brushed after enjoying oatmeal-based shampooing. He was deemed "the best basset" ever to come through their grooming facilities. My review of ''The Core'' does not involve the words best, best of, good, or even okay. It was boring. I don't really like Hillary Swank, or at least the character she was portraying was boring. This movie desperately wanted to be an Armageddon, but instead it came off as future fodder for Mystery Science Theater 3000. One-time see. After 90 minutes I was praying for the end of the film to come. Thankfully shortly thereafter it was all over and I made a dash out into the parking lot where a sleet storm was waiting to pelt me on the head.
This past week I've been trying to establish that if you could take a step back and realize where most of your views and opinions come from, you'd be left with The Media. The Media love to piss you off. They love to make you angry and stroke your emotions. You will want more from the media as a result. Getting unbiased uneditorialized news is next to impossible. The Accuracy In Media web site makes a noble attempt to report on all the missing holes. Unfortunately, they end up sounding very right-wing and conservative as a result of their attempts to fill in the other side of the news.
Before I forget, I got extended to stay here until May 2, 2003. My return to H-Town is slightly delayed. After then I'll be back to let ex-girlfriend's ex-girlfriends stalk me at goth nightclubs. Nice.
grrr
2003.03.27 20.02
Windows XP is the bomb and McAfee Virus Scan SUCKS! I installed McAfee and my machine basically stopped working. I eventually found my way to the System Restore utility and now everything is back to normal. If you have the means, I highly recommend the XP.safety
2003.03.24 13.26
Had terrible dreams last night that I was trapped in Iraq. In my hand I tightly gripped my Glock 9mm service weapon. I was constantly obsessed with the safety and whether it was on or off. I think watching ''8 Mile'' Saturday night has affected me. There's a scene where a guy shoots himself because he didn't have the safety on. This doesn't mean my stance about the whole thing has changed. Read this article. Is diplomacy with psychotic butchers possible? Could we have been diplomatic with Hitler? 125,000 people were protesting in New York City this past Saturday. Weren't they worried about leaving their mobile homes empty?I am reading the blog of an Iraqi citizen using the pseudonym Salam Pax. Very intriguing.
spinal tap reference
2003.03.21 16.47
Time is running out.This is your last chance to preorder "American Life," Madonna's new Digital Single. They're sending it out Monday morning, complete with a special voice message from Madonna to her fans. If you order the Digital Single now (it's only $1.49!) you'll hear the song before anybody else. And if you don't order? You'll sit around all day Monday, jingling your change and wondering what you're missing. Nobody wants that.
Yes, that's not really me in the last paragraph. That's my marketing voice talking. Right now I am listening to Rammstein's album ''Mutter.'' It is very calming to have ''The Matrix'' type music blasting directly into my ear canals given all the chaos of the NCAA Playoffs, the war in Iraq and the fact that it is 78 degrees in here. I have the volume turned all the way up to 10. I wish I could turn it up to 11.
just so you know...
2003.03.17 6.48
I got some flack email from a guy I know named Berg in response to my jab at the French. Supposedly the French had "working plumbing while we were still using corn cobs." I'm not sure how that makes it O.K. for them to protect their huge financial investments in Iraq by threating a veto under the guise of peace, but I'll leave that to the readers of this journal to decide. By that line of thinking I believe the Greeks had working plumbing prior to the French, so if you are Greek please contact someone from France and let them know who's the boss.Did you hear about The Dixie Chicks' singer Natalie Maines? In London she recently said, ''Just so you know, we're ashamed the president of the United States is from Texas.'' How dumb is that? Could you think of a dumber thing to say? She later issued two separate apologies, each one getting more specific but still hedging. Radio stations around the U.S. are banning the Dixie Chicks as a result. Too funny. I don't really care and will continue to listen to them. Just because one of them is ignorant doesn't mean they don't make good music. I mean, come on, look at Michael Jackson for crying out loud.
CNN/USA Today/Gallup Poll said 64 percent of Americans favor sending U.S. ground forces to remove Saddam from power -- up five percentage points from a similar survey earlier this month. So, even though it feels like there have been bigger and better peace rallies and such, the truth is that support is gaining in favor of the President. Bush is smart for saying we can avoid war by Saddam leaving the country. Why can't Saddam just pack up his blood money and leave? Can anybody honestly say we shouldn't ask him to leave and that he deserves to be their leader? He could save thousands of lives by skipping town. Some people think that the citizens in Iraq want Saddam to stay. Did you hear there were huge peace rallies in Iraq? Guess who PAID people to attend them? Saddam's son. Duh. Don't believe the hype.
Have you seen any of the interviews MTV has been holding with people on the street about the war? It's amazing how vacuous a lot of them are as they stake their turf on how they're anti-war and ''would never want to be in a war cuz there aren't milkshakes and quarter pounders with cheese if you are in a war and you could die from being shot in the buttocks and I sure don't want to die in a war, like, omigod, is this going to be on MTV? Oh, wow! That is sooo cool! Can I say hi to the Real World cast?''
informed source
2003.03.12 17.27
I was reading the US Airways in-flight magazine the other day. They had a great article about Jeanne Phillips (a.k.a. Dear Abby) called ''A Friend In Need'' which discussed all of the friendship advice she has doled out over the years. She gave a great set of points that you can use to identify the type of friends you might have, as well as the type of friend that you are yourself. I was impressed with how these sized up a lot of my friends so I thought I'd transcribe them for you now. I know that this isn't as good as a political debate with an Age of Empires playing psycho nut-case, but rest assured I will revert back to my old ways soon enough.- Know friends from acquaintances. An acquaintance is the one who keeps you posted on ''The Sopranos'' and sends you email jokes. A friend is someone you can tell anything to. You can trust that person with your confidence. Friends need to be supportive of your dreams and plans and choices. A friend celebrates your victories with you. And if they're just a little bit jealous, they fight the urge.
- Be candid. Friends do not nod blankly when the people they care about smoke too much, gamble paychecks, or cling to an abusive situation. A friend has to be someone who can be honest. ''Can I be blunt with you?''
- Cushion your ''honesty.'' Do not pass judgment. If you start judging the person, the person will pick up on it and become defensive and tune you out. Let them know you are really on their side when your concern is that they're going up in flames. Be soothing. Reflect the truth of the friendship without softening your opinion. Be kind.
- Keep your mouth shut. Keep things that are private private. Many of us are not disciplined at this. Do not blab, check up, or chide with an ''I told you so.''
- Beware the pseudo-friend. This includes three types of personalities:
- The Sapper.If you feel the need for a big caffeine jolt at the end of a phone call, you're probably a victim of the ''sapper'' friend -- your basic complain-o-matic. These are folks who live in perpetual chaos, refuse advice, blame others, can't get motivated, and so on. Just being in their presence can drain you. With these people you have to learn to say, ''I'd love to talk, but I'm just too busy right now.'' Then hang up.
- The Advice Collector. These particular ''friends'' can't decide on a pair of shoes without consulting half the people in their phone book. They tell everything to everybody. Maybe they're looking for a consensus. To cope with this type of person, see advice regarding The Sapper.
- The Conversation Hog. This does not include the friend who can't wait to talk about his latest trip to China. A certain amount of bragging is fine. But it does include the person who can't then say, ''So, what's going on with you? Tell me!'' If you suspect you've been demoted from friend to audience member, call him on it -- but do so with a smile on your face. Your friend may not even be aware that he's doing it.
- The above descriptions can also be self-applied. If friends have been ditching you lately, check the list.
- Give friends room. Friendships aren't hot house flowers. They're more like good sturdy maples -- the kind of thing you can depend on and enjoy without tending to every day. A good friend doesn't have to check in every 24 to 48 hours. Time can go by between conversations, but friends can always pick up where they left off. And when the chips are down you know what person will be there for you.
- Treasure acquaintances. They're the people you have a warm hello with. And who knows? Enough of those warm hellos can eventually morph into a good friendship. The one real difference between a friend and an acquaintance is that a friend is someone who gives back.
calling the police
2003.03.11 6.10
I bought four Police CDs today from Best Buy: Outlandos d'Amour, Reggatta de Blanc, Ghost in the Machine and Synchronicity. I'm starting at the beginning. Vincini said go back to the beginning, and I met him here in the Thieves Forest, so this is the beginning. Ahem. Right. I am taking a break from political journal entries for a couple of days while I consider how best to convey my disgust with France. Perhaps mailing them a chocolate box filled with Chew Chew Poo?
the freaks come out at night again
2003.03.10 0.22
Psycho boy wrote me again but unfortunately it was more of the same of his long-winded, short-sighted, unfounded conspiracy theories and idiotic hypothesii. Looks like the folks who print copies of ''Catcher in the Rye'' for people like this are set. It's a shame he wasn't one of those human shields. I wonder if it's not too late to sign him up?the freaks come out
2003.03.09 8.43
I just received what has to be the most psycho email message I have ever received. I know that there are creepies, nakies, and wackos out there. Now one of them has written me. The only messages he has ever posted that I could find regarded dissing someone who posted in the paranormal newsgroup, a message about the gold edition of Age of Empires with the expansion included (Conquerors!) and two empty test messages he posted in alt.food.mexican-cooking. GO TO ALT.TEST TO POST TEST MESSAGES YOU NEWBIE TWIT!Here is psycho boy's deluded email as well as my response. Honestly it is unreasonable to think I can get through to someone as sick as this person is, but I figured, what the hell.
From: "Jim61" <knightowl7@earthlink.net>
Subject: Hello, Super Genius
Date: Sun, 9 Mar 2003 02:14:03 -0800
George Bush is an errand boy for wealth, primarly focused in England. In effect he and others have reversed the effort in the revolutionary war. The collection of people he works for, are uninsipired idiots as evidenced by thier pawn in George. If they were smarter, they would've groomed an individual like Ronald Reagan for the Oval office.
First off, your email is a grammatical atrocity. The comma splice between ''he works for'' and ''are uninspired idiots'' -- WTF do you need a pause there for? So you can breath into your inhaler and take another swig of sugar water? Your rant is poorly constructed on a sadly consistent level. I'd rate it at a ninth grade reading level, although I suspect I am being too generous.The Iraq situation and the planes plowing into the skyscraper are a compete fraud. Nothing about is is outside the power of the US government, as it is currently.
Your observation that cooperation between the UK and US equals a primary focus in England is deluded. You must be joking. Do you realize how many years we've had a strong financial relationship with the UK? It started before W and your mysterious ''Others'' were in diapers. Get your facts straight. Just because you see George and Tony on the TV agreeing with each other doesn't mean that it equates the notion that they are reversing the US gains of the revolutionary war. I believe we'd have to start paying England some back-taxes, as well as returning their colonies in order to do anything that even remotely resembles ''reversing the effort.'' Religious freedom was one of the gains of that war, too, brainiac, and I could not fathom any US leader EVER backing down on that point. Your argument is crap.
Riiiiight. Nothing outside the power of Hollywood, either. Sounds like you have a problem distinguishing between reality and fiction. Could this be why you were were hoping the ''uninspired idiots'' were to groom a Ronald Reagon type president? Why? So he could entertain you? What's that? You like Reagan because he's funny? Maybe I got this all wrong 'cause I'm a little confused. What do you mean he's funny? Like the way he talks? "No, no, like the way Reagon tell stories, you know?" No I don't know! You said it. He makes you laugh? Is he a clown? Does he amuse you? Is he a clown here to amuse you!? "No, no." Then HOW is he funny? What is so funny about Reagan? Tell me! Tell me right now!!!Osama bin Laden is an employee of George Bush's family, they've made each other millions of dollars. Periodic releases of warnings of possible Terrorist activity and targets have one thread in common, nothing ever happens. Because as a financial effort the terrorists do not exist. Any evidence of thier activites since 9-11 would be the direct creation of the US government to deceive the USA.
I am pretty much dumbfounded at how you managed to have such a convoluted view of the relationship between world figures. So, first you're saying Tony Blair and Bush collude to return financial wealth taken 200+ years ago to the UK, and now you're telling me George is also Osama's boss. Man, George is pretty busy! Last time I checked he was also running the White House -- all on a 7 hour work day! You say you want to see evidence in the form of a terrorist act whenever the terror level is raised, and yet you claimed earlier that the US goverment powered the 9-11 attack. So, why can't they ''orchestrate'' an attack whenever they raise the threat level? BECAUSE THE GOVERNMENT ISN'T CAUSING THE ATTACKS! Geez. Obviously 2 plus 2 does not equal 4 in your case. How many voices are in your head, anyway? Come back when you've got a quorum.They have a stranglehold on the media and are relying on this to continue the deception.
While I agree that Al Qaeda has a stranglehold on Al Jazeera, getting them to broadcast whatever propoganda they see fit, I'm afraid I must disagree with you about the media here in the United States. Unless you've been living under a rock you will find that almost all of the mainstream media are staffed by liberally minded folks who would like nothing better than to see George Bush fall on his ass. This isn't to say they didn't want to see Clinton fall on his ass because controversy sells! The media are third-party objectivists and are not affiliated with any political office. You should know that. So, to follow up again, you're now saying Bush, Blair, Osama, and The Free Press are in cahoots. Okay. And monkeys might fly out of my butt!Thier power and influence is so great that I sleep well every night, knowing that if this is the best that they can do, we have nothing to fear. All we need do is focus the efforts to keep the information channels clear and free on the internet, and it does not matter what they do. Power is shfting away from objective centers and toward individual responsibility. Very quickly they will become empty formality.
Not really. When you say ''All WE need do is focus...'' are you referring to a group of people -- or to the collective of personalities floating in your brain? The idea that the internet will replace George, Tony and Osama's good buddy The Media is years off, if ever. Oh, and how are YOU keeping the information channels clear and free on the internet, exactly? Could the Constitution of the United States, guaranteeing free speech be to blame? Why don't you find a plunger and apply it to the side of your head. You will surely find something trapped there.The military will have it's largest problem with abandonment. People will be seeing the peace effort as being more courageous than the war effort. Regardless of the size and influence of objective power structures, they will all become emasculated to a faint voice that is heard everywhere.
Will that voice be heard even louder in your noggin? The military have been trained to kill. Once we go to war you will only see Iraqi deserters who would rather give up than die in support of Saddam and his inhuman imperialistic policies. I'm impressed that you used the word emasculated. Good for you! That's where my ninth grade assessment of the tepid scrawl that you call writing came from, by the way. Unfortunately, your final driving point is that the military will become a faint voice that is heard everywhere. What? If it is a faint voice, it *won't* be heard anywhere. It has to be a loud voice to be heard everywhere. See? Proof reading is very important, jackass.The next 20 years will be the most intresting period in human history. Miracles will surpass and embarass both science and religion's expectations so that neither will show their face anywhere and expect credibility. What was fiction will become the patterns for the future.
This is how you're ending your rant with me? You have hope for the future? What about the Bush-Blair-Osama-Press-Military connection? What about the internet killing the media? Will Cyndi Lauper ever put out another hit album? Where are the answers?! Why must I be surrounded by FRICKIN' IDIOTS!!!! Either you got too disinterested in your own incomprehensive drivel, or your Ritalin is finally kicking in. Go back to playing Age of Empires and come back when you've grown a frontal lobe.
fair is fair
2003.03.08 15.32
I plan to post a response to an article about those in favor of military action. They too are guilty of ignorance, so don't think I have it out just for one side or the other. I am an equal opportunity annoyer.an idiot by any other name...
2003.03.07 5.04
Several weeks ago, groups of peace activist ''human shields'' arrived from the West in order to prevent the bombing of Iraq. These brainless monkeys are finally getting a lesson in how Iraq treats its people now that they've discovered, to their dismay, that Iraq wanted them to protect REAL MILITARY TARGETS. These dopes thought they could pick where they were going to stay. Nope! Read the article and be amazed:06 Mar 2003 18:37
Iraq sends five Western human shields home
By Dominic Evans
BAGHDAD, March 6 (Reuters) - Iraq ordered five human shields out of the country on Thursday after a dispute over where the Western peace activists should deploy to deter possible U.S. military strikes.
Accusing them of undermining the ''noble and courageous'' spirit of other volunteers, senior Iraqi official Abdul-Razzaq al-Hashimi told a heated meeting of about 100 human shields in Baghdad that the five should leave by Friday.
It was the latest setback to the high-profile mission to Iraq by peace activists whose visit has been plagued by infighting, illness and a broken-down red London bus.
Leave it to these morons to decide to drive a red London bus all the way from England to Iraq. Brilliant cheap bastards. They should have driven their Volvos and BMWs down in retrospect. Wait til you hear what exactly consistutes ''undermining the noble and courageous spirit'' of the other pinkos.''Out of concern for the success of the noble cause you are here for, and so as not to let a few people in the group undermine this beautiful activity, I'm very sorry to say that I'm asking the five people to leave,'' Hashimi told the meeting. He said the five who had been told to leave had set themselves up as representatives of the group and had been ''holding unnecessary meetings, wasting time, knocking on doors at midnight...(and) asking stupid questions''.
Stupid questions like, ''Why do we have to go to power plants and refineries to prevent bombing? Can't we stay here and protect the Holiday Inn?''''We appreciate very much that you are here, but the rules of the house have to be respected,'' he said.
Activists at the meeting said the row centered on a disagreement over who should decide where they should deploy. Some had wanted to station themselves in hospitals or schools but were told instead to go to power stations.
Former U.S. marine Ken O'Keefe, one of those ordered to leave, said it was ''absolutely unacceptable that human shields would arrive and immediately be taken to sites without our knowledge''.
This is the same nitwit who on January 25, 2003 said, ''Our strategy is potentially dangerous but that is the risk we must take in standing beside our brothers and sisters in Iraq.'' Right. As long as you get to pick and choose which Iraq brothers and sisters you get to stand by. Duh.O'Keefe, whose Human Shield Action Iraq group coordinated the departure of dozens of volunteers from London six weeks ago, said Hashimi's decision would ensure that many other human shields would be leaving Baghdad too.
''It's just a shame that there may be Iraqi lives that could be lost as a result of numbers diminishing,'' he told Reuters.
''Well, except for Saddam's life. The Iraqis asked us to strap ourselves to the top of his lead motorcade car and there was no way we were going for that!''One of the red double-decker buses which ferried O'Keefe and other human shields to Baghdad broke down en route from London. Two more are now stranded in Lebanon, with their owner needing $5,500 to ship them home.
Why not beg for the money through PayPal? Or how about taking up a collection amongst the volunteers? It's not like they're going to need the money after they're dead, right?Some volunteers fell ill on the journey and dozens more have since left Iraq, saying they had wanted to protect hospitals and schools but had been forced out to refineries, power plants and water works.
Volunteer Peggy Wentworth claimed that she had been ''plagued with diarrhea and recurring nightmares. ''I can't take it! I can't take it anymore! I can't take it anymore!'' On his way out the door, O'Keefe bitch slapped Wentworth upside the head and yelled, ''Calm down! Get ahold of yourself!''But others said they would not quit.
''We planned to be here and we intend to stay here,'' British volunteer Karl Dallas told Hashimi to applause from the meeting.
Dallas said it was reasonable for Iraq to want the shields to defend power plants because hospitals and schools were over-stretched and could not cope with visitors.
The untold story is that the Iraqis were worried that these fat Westerners would drain all of the snack machines in the hospital waiting room. ''We only get those machines refilled, like, once a month,'' pleaded Baghdad Memorial chief neurologist Haziz Fwazala.
These pathetic idiots went into a country where *everyone* lives under fear of death from their own police, where hundreds of thousands are dying of starvation, where tens of thousands have ''vanished'' for disagreeing with Saddam and where the income brought in from limited oil sales is diverted from purchasing food to pursuing frickin' illegal weapons programs! YOU WENT THERE HOPING TO STOP ANYONE FROM INTERFERING WITH THAT! They are astonished that the Iraqis took them up on their offer to serve as living safegaurds by using them to protect weapons depositories. Upon learning this, now you're saying it's ''absolutely unacceptable.'' These guys need to remember why they went there. To prevent a war. If they don't have the balls to do it then they are probably too half-baked to figure out how to get *out* of Iraq.
Seriously. Someone should blockade these pathetic fools from getting out of there. No one needs these people dragging down the average intelligence of wherever their Enchanted Joy Bus lands. Maybe some of the needier Iraqis can trade them for passage to a place where it's safer for an Iraqi to be.
bayer/tylenol drug cocktail
2003.03.06 14.55
I got some great advice on controlling fever by alternating Tylenol and Aspirin every two hours from the medically saavy QueenBeth. Last night was terrible. 101 degree temperature. Waking up in a sweat. Dreaming I had lockjaw. Who comes up with this stuff? I almost feel well enough to go back to work, although it is 2:30 PM in the afternoon and the 45 minute trip might not be very wise given the short day. Going to boot up my work laptop and crank out some output in the interim while I mull things over.
Al Qaeda detainee Khalid Shaikh Mohammed bears more than a striking resemblence to porn's most famous actor Ron Jeremy. But wait, there more! They also are known as ''Big Guys'' to those that work with them. Interesting coincidence... or conspiracy? Both have enough body hair to frighten a young bear. Khalid sees blowing stuff up as his job. Ron sees blow jobs as his stuff. Khalid is probably trapped in a room surrounded by 25 men who are beating Al Qaeda information out of him. Ron is probably trapped in a room surrounded by 25 women who are beating DNA information out of him. Khalid expects to sleep with 72 virgins when he dies. Ron will finally get a break from sleeping with virgins when he dies.
okay, for real, the eugene oregon video
2003.03.05 7.11
Enjoy 20 minutes of pure Dude and Veronica in all the splendor of grandeur of Eugene, Oregon. Specifications for this movie include: a generous 340kps in 320x240 mode, 30 fabulous frames per second, really big 4:3 ratio, and freakin' enormous 51 megabytes of total download size. You may stream the video if you've got broadband, or right-click and choose ''Save Target As'' to download a copy for yourself. You'll watch it at least two, maybe three times. No, really.I am getting sick. Fever coming on. Aches. Pains. Dizziness. It's like being in love, only with a higher white blood cell count.
eugene oregon video
2003.03.03 22.53
I posted the Eugene Oregon trip video only to have to pull it down. My machine was shiznitting out last night when I was uploading. Should have tried to upload again after I rebooted, but it was 4 AM and I was cognitively challenged. Come back tonight and I'll make another attempt. In the meantime, I'm considering buying either a Sony PictureBook PC or an Apple PowerBook G4. Both are 12'' and both have lotsa neat0 features. I thoroughly enjoyed the experience of editing the Oregon video on the laptop like I did, so that's my goal with this new laptop. I ship my Vaio off to its new home in California tonight.
