Found photo of marketing department that’s been been putting stupid Anne Murray spiritual music commercials on Cartoon Network.

Watching Anne Murray commercial. Wondering why it’s on Cartoon Network. Every 4 hours Anne’s inspirational songs start going at it on this channel, effectively horrifying children everywhere. Great example of a marketing department on crack. Watched This is Spinal Tap from start to finish for first time. Pretty good. You can tell most of it […]

Can’t get Partridge Family theme song Come On Get Happy out of my head. Considering labotomy. No accidents on freeway today. Traffic blows. Wondering if I can drive an ambulance to work. HOV lane people speed past me. Need to develop lifelike artificial passengers. Hard to find good fake people. Here are some of an […]

Neighborhood civic association hates me. Got second letter in mail that said, "You’d better mow your lawn right now, or we’re going to mail you another letter telling you to mow your lawn!" Can’t stop knees from shaking. Bought new lawn mower two weeks ago from Sears. Self propelled and more horsepower than my garage […]

Restored missing entry from a week ago. In meantime, receiving junk mail from local bond offices. Bad news travels fast. All heard I skipped out on ‘failure to signal’ jury trial. Wondering if scary bondsman did his job or if I’m a fugitive. Went into closet to try on jailhouse orange shirts and pants. Plan […]

Found out jury trial for this morning actually happened yesterday morning. Sucks. Called court. Court phone person says, "All the cases for this morning have been dismissed." Dammit! Went to good friend who has tons of tickets. Got card for lawyer. Drove to creepy lawyer’s office located right across from courthouse. Got parking meter spot. […]

What did I tell you? Traffic cop directing me around this example of Houston driving got really pissed when I whipped out the camera. Laughed at his crazy hand-waving antics and drove on. Cops are kooky. Dead truck on freeway slowed me down to 2 MPH crawl. Offered to help cop push truck off overpass […]

Considering starting new section called Daily Driving Accident. Everytime I drive to work there is always a different accident. Sister section to this would be Daily Driving Idiot. This would include brief details of stupid things Houston drivers have done before my eyes. Today some dude U-turns from opposing side at exact moment my light […]

Saw Almost Famous sneak at movies last night. Very kewl. Cameron Crowe’s approach to filmmaking integrates period music with scenes that are completely and utterly believable. Not a big crowd at screening. Sad about that. Marketing for movie is being done all wrong. Frances McDormand knocks out the role of the main character’s mother. Official […]

Went out last night to club called Surfside Sally’s. Got impression nobody there is really named Sally. Hot tub and wooden decks totally gave me impression I was surfside. Not. Drank Everclear punch from fishbowl. Smoked cigarette. Woke up today hating fish, cigarettes, bowls, red straws and people named Sally. Bought groceries. Remembered Happy Days […]